Thursday, November 08, 2007

the funk

i've been meaning to write, really i have! but i've been in a funk ... there i said it! i've been depressed, i'm withdrawing into my shell, i'm not the fun and happy gal i like to be. why? i'm not really sure this time. nothing of epic proportions has happened, life is good for the most part. no major calamities. i'm just feeling a bit "peckish". but i'm outing myself, becuz i want to be real, authentic and genuine. life isn't always a bowl of cherries.

i have had a history of depression over the years. for many years i just lived with it and ignored it. living in the land of "de nile" can be a great experience--ha! but the last few years i have been more proactive and have taken steps to keep my depression at a bare minimum, if not cured altogether.

one thing i like to do when i feel the funk coming on is read the psalms. it seems to me that david and the other writers had their share of feeling depressed. and yet i see them turning to God. they were real in their weakness and cries of distress, they didn't try to hide it from Him, He knows anyway, so who am i trying to fool? and they knew that He was the answer to their circumstance, their weakness, their feelings. i want to be like them and turn to God too. i want to put my hope in Him, trust Him, praise Him and rest in Him.

one of my fav psalms says: "my flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." ps 73:26

i'm hoping that this funk will pass on and i will be back to the fun-loving, friendly chica that i imagine i am soon.


Linda said...

Hey, thanks for stopping by 2nd cup today. I checked out both of your blogs, and they are encouraging. I, too, have dealt with depression in the past. It's been a major defining moment in my life.

Hi. My name is Alanna. said...

You know, I read today that almost all women tend to go thru at least one major depression in their lives. Wow. Didn't know the statistic was that high. And it makes me think we should probably be better at supporting one another thru those times. Maybe they are really chemical imbalances. Maybe they are brought on by food. Maybe they have real spiritual significance. Maybe a whole lot of things. But maybe just maybe if God is who He says He is then even our depression - and whatever causes it - also has purpose God will use. Just maybe...

hope so with me too??